anyway, i tried one trick to see if i can actually put in my faith on some people. i played it and made that person promise not to tell. but i know its not the truth but this goes just how much a person can take up a promise. well, it shows that not everyone you can trust. because trust is such a big word to handle with. i know it's evil of me to do such a thing on someone but on a certain extent to know if that responsibility have been carried out faithfully, one have to come up with such trivia things to see if its worth it. turns out its not. and now, the big hoo-haa from all that saga turnsout to be i'm the bad guy. i'm the cause of such rumour and i'm not to be trusted. well, suits you. all i can say, you are so new. im not at a gain nor im at a loss.

by the way, fad's entry about lies is so true. and i loved his last paragraph about "lies can destroy you and your friendship with the people that you love...etc etc...". i respect him in a way that he can be really smart if he wants to. he's such an intelligent blogger i tell you. that's one of the reasons i still love him as a friend. to a certain extent he's mature. have a read of his entry about lies again and again and do understand it.

i'm applying it to myself too, mind you(whoever you are). and if i did something wrong in the past, hurting someone, bitching on someone or even defamed someone, from the bottom of my heart i apologies. i'm a new person ever since i started to grab a hold of myself and getting to know my religion and my beliefs. too bad some new people think they know me to bad-mouthing me before they even ask me why i came up with such a lie. i'm not criticising just sympathising. too bad no emotion can be predicted on cyber.

now what's running in my mind is not whatever is going in rounds from mouth to mouth but whatever is happening to one of my friend, A. let's just stick to that. this A friend of mine has been long gone. as in not socialising like before. and before you know it, whatever A is going through is too much for A to take. just imagine, A leave the group, A distances, A got a new partner. the partner hates us, the partner prevents A from hanging around too much with us. the partner possesed over everything that A has, even to distancing A from high school friends. and A is so swooned over by the partner that A did not realise that the partner is not alone. infact the partner have another half. 5 bloody long years. but A is not aware of it. poor thing. now the thing is how to let A know about it? when A is so into the partner, A won't listen to anyone but the partner. hmmmm~ tricky tricky....

well anyway to you mister-i-know-everything-and-im-so-possessive-and-obssessive-but-naive-coz-im-actually-stupid, i know from the start you never liked me. so who gives a shit? but i'm still angered by the thought of how you trying to manipulate my dear friends into turning their backs on me. i'm glad one of them is still around, hanging by my side but not as closely bonded but still loved. read this you little piece of shit, be aware that not only you don't have that many friends, and you have their patience triggered to boiling points, if you don't jolly well change who you are right now and do some soul-seraching for yourself, mark my words, you gonna lose them or have a huge arguement with them. not even an encouraging working colleague, supportive family or blessed anything. infact you might lose your newly-stead boyfriend. because you are so irritatingly stupid to know what works and what doesn't. have some self-respect and stop swooning over your ex-boyfriend because he is so not interested in going back to you. i'm not cursing but i guess this is the only way i can give you a wake-up call since you hate me so much which i don't know why up till now.

someone once said, "people care about people who care about themselves..." but i think otherwise...

toodles