isit sucha difficult task to b trusted or to trust ppl? sum ppl juz luv to assume n presume stuff. sum even love the art of manipulating. wats worst, ppl love to tell lies. even on the smallest tiniest bit of it. it makes them feel great juz to lie abt almost everythng. but dnt they get it tht if u lied once, u will lie again n sooner or later ur entangled in a web of lies n theres no way for u to get out of it.
im not saying tht i dnt lie. i do. who doesnt. but theres limitations to it. usually i lie to save my ass from getting into a spit of death. n sumtyms i lie jz becoz i wana shut the person who talks so much abt his/her life juz to make it sound great n substantianally qualified. duh~ lame rite. if u want attention, get it the right way. dont create stupid stuffs abt ur so called ideal life.
its ok to hav a dream. dream n live it. not dream n fake it tht it does exists. wtf!
im now at the verge of not bein able to depend on any1. i cnt say i dnt trust, i do but not fully. coz it seems like certain black history of the past is rising. i had enuff of bein in sucha situation where ppl workforce togeda n go against me like im a fruit where u beats to tha pulp juz to get the juice out of it. i do bliv in karma if u do onto othas, othas will do onto u. so i knw when to stop n when to confess. sumtyms i will sit n tell myself is it worth it to b nice? isit worth it to tryna improve urself to b the kinda person ppl can adapt to? isit wrong to b who u r? isit wrong to b approachable? isit wrong to b the one tht ppl can lean on?
im juz bein me. i cnt change tht for othas. like i said in the end its all abt u. goin thru great times or hard times, is all abt u. u juz wana share with othas ur experience. isnt it thotful to share ur thots with certain ppl tht u cn share it with? its not called mind-fuck ok...its call caring. haiz. dnt knw lah sum ppl. we all hav our own life n we want our own personal space. be small as it may, its still a time for ur own.
im glad i hav sum frens tht undastands me. im glad tht i can share it with sum ppl. eventho one of them may think its a crappy thing, its a fucked up move, its all poopy bullshits but i knw deep down tht fren of mine is sorta mature enuff to think. eventho he keep telling himself tht hes stupid, bimbotic, dont giv a damn abt anythng n to hell with whueva whu hav a problem with him. hahahaha. stupid. u knw whu u r. hehs.
wateva it is. if to sum ppl whu cnt take me as me, i dnt wana create a ruckus with u. u juz lead ur own life n stop bothering me. stop even to hang with me juz to blend in or to hav a betta aspects in life. ur juz a sorry ass loser. get ova urself n stop tryna b "my fav friend"...im me. if u cnt take it its ur prob n i wont hav any loss of not having u as one of the ppl in my life. i cnt even give a freaking sympathetical feelings towards u. juz a waste of time.
anw sumthng to brighten my mood, starting work next week. finally got a real stable one n i pray i stay n stop job hopping. hehehe. today will b the briefing of smack dat beat comp n i criously hav a feeling its gona b my last. it will take sumtym tht im gona b involve in dance. need tht long break n concerntrate on uplifitng my life. but tht doesnt mean im gona stop supporting sexxay groovaz shaking their thang at any comp or performance. hehehe. i love to watch dance. its refreshing. hehehe....kklah. i gtg. nak siap2. meeting the bitches of eastside. hehehe.
toodles
mizbithaqueen
p.s:
wonder if ur gona b there? hehe. juz wana c ur face coz its been a while...hehehe. n damn, im beginning to hate the thots of bein single. but to put myself bein attached is scary too. hahaha.
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