[currently listening to - fuck off stupidheads by mmi ]
ok. ive heard n confided. n i cnt bliv my ears. i dnt knw whether i cn b part of it anymore. its too hypocritically absurd. its too much now. evrytym for the third tyme bfore we commit into sumthng, u hav an illegal talk n bam! u go bombarding beating the shit out of me. making me the bad guy. its like im so bad tht u r the good ones. like hello~ im not mr knw it all, i juz happen to knw wat is expected next. n when u dnt listen, its all crappy n all u did is bawl n when i go HA! I TOLDJA, u think i talk big.
talk things out with him. n since theres too much disagreement, n no support to wat u say, i stand corrected. n evrytym i correct myself, u think its cool but then again u repeat wateva shits u gotta hav against me, AGAIN!....i aint mad. im drained. drained of disappointment. i mean afta all we go thru, it was all talk?
we keep saying we need a resolution but when the tyme is right, theres no suggestion. n when i came up with one, u kept shut. to think it was ok. but when u changed the idea, i kept shut, u think i cnt take it. dnt act like u knw me. juz bcoz i dnt go all talk on it doesnt mean i have anythng against it. aftaall, its majority. n i listen rather then i voiced out. coz this time i prefer to listen then suggest. im tired. u may not agree with it but theres more to me than u knw. so dont assume or presume me. its so wrong.
juz when i changed a lil of ur idea to make it more broad, u cnt accept it, u cnt adapt to it, force urself to swallow it but end up u bitch bout me? wassup wif tht? and then i gotta knw tht the idea wasnt urs at all. n even if its urs, it wasnt supposed to b tht theatrical but u make it tht way. plz not even me but him also who try n try to fit into ur idea but when it fails a lil, i decided to change it abit to fit for all, there u came biting sayin tht u cnt adapt to it. when its much more simple than wat u gave.
n when u are with me for quite sumtym, u shud knw how i work. i love detailed work. i love versatility. n from when u came, u shud b able to accept it but no~ u hate it. u prefer simple, idiotproof, and family friendly ideas tht evryone has oredy done. wake up n smell the air. wud u rather blend in or stand out?
we've been standing out. we've been the talk of town. we use to think tht being among the best is better than being winners but now, u wana b winners when ur not giving all u got. im trying to climb the ladder but u prefer to jump up. remember its a karma thingy. what goes up, must come down. n if ur up all the way, u will go down. i rather enjoy slow fame than immediate fame. i knw afta this u gona go bitchy abt it. fine i dont mind. its wat u always do. n yes! i do it too but i will confront n bring up the subject not bitch abt it n timid when ur suppose to talk abt it.
let me make it clear. i criously think i had enuff. if u cnt take more of me than u can swallow, i walk out. its the best. n i knw u will love it. less stress less timidity less inferior. n more freedom u mite think. i juz can do this anymore. i can dance to ur tune but ur tune is running out of its rhythm n i cant do it anymore. its ridiculous for me.
lucky to hav him to confide to. n i guess he can b a better partner for u. furhtermore, rather than putting my heart n soul to something i cherish, i mite concerntrate on myself n make me happy.
i got bitten by the mouth tht i feed.
toodles
mizbithaqueen
