"Lagi dihina, sedang hatiku masih terluka. Kau bukan seperti yang aku kenali, waktu kita bercinta....Mengapa tak seperti dulu?"
kata2 ini sering bermain di fikiran ku sejak hari jumaat yang lalu. memang benar tiada perasaan cinta antara kita. walaupun cuma aku sahaja yang menyintai. namun kenapa ku dicaci sebegitu? walau diri ini dibenci olehmu, tidakkah engkau menyerlahkan suatu tindakan yang beralas terhadapku? haruskah aku di lihat serong olehmu? haruskah aku dilayan sebegitu?
"Bisa sungguh luka ini walau tak berdarah"
ok. so we met up on sat. for no one is intrested to go prac. well need some rest thts it. so it was sorta gypsy kinda outing. with no idea where to go(as usual)...so initially meet at plaza sing then we head to city hall area. where we slack at esplanade, marina sq, suntec and evvrywher in between. i can say its kinda tiring outing. loads of walking ard. i guess if we hav a general test for the day, confirm we excelled.
so the ppl who turned up was ifa ayun aishah fadz zal fyk neya amir akid nor n me. to the exceptional of nor's fren n my cuzzie tasha. we'll basically i was enjoying my time with them esp neya ifa ayun n my hubby. we joked dance laughed. n with neya, we sing. ehehe. lurve it. shud go karaoke someday.
then afta evryone's ready to hit their cribs, i received a call from PRINCE(s)..they wana mit up and slack. so ya i agree, for i wasnt filled up yet and theres reasons for tht. so we met up at bugis where lata on we had our supper at jilani. damn i miss tht place. weird but true. n hell i didnt know it became a port for mats n minahs dangdut. ehehehe. whole time spent was the dangdut music tht played.
afta tht they decided to hit the club. well i agreed coz they r paying for evrythng. who wuddnt grab tht chance ryte? so we head to stjames. we decided to go to powerhouse instead of powerstation for the queue is like freaking anaconda sak. let me share sum details ok. the music was nice, a total fusion. the crowd was ok. mostly ang mohs. the atmosphere was blazing. ok so we had like ard 40++ jugs and drinks. for there are ard 24 of us. hehehe. and erm i guess ard 30++ boxes of ciggs burnt. hahaha. kecohrism. was tipsy aniwaes. njoying myself there.
but thn agn while njoying the moments, sumthng juz wuddnt let me b happy. infact i was feeling sad. for wat had happen really struck me and i was left with the feeling of disgust, unwanted rejected. i dnt knw if its just my wild imagination or its plain mean reality.
"Ku sedari hina diri ini. Kosong tiada bererti. Biarlah diriku pergi. Ku ubati lukaku sendiri"
but aniwaes, i wuddnt want to keep tht feel burnt me down. stand up, face front, walked swiftfully. eventho it hurts like freakin F...it has to happen sooner or later.
aniwaes, lookin forward for my work tomorrow. wish me luck.
"Yakin ku di sudut hati...Aku masih kau cintai"
toodles
mizbithaqueen
p.s:
when the thoughts of you come to me
the moment passes coiled with tension
even beneath the sheet of water
my body burns....
Taking memories of present moments, going with heavy steps, the heart wept and the eyes welled up; the spirit cried out.
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